Archive for August, 2016

I’d Call It A Parent Thing, But I Could Do This Even Before You Were Born

August 17, 2016

About yesterday, son . . .

For what it’s worth, I respect that you don’t like it when I raise my voice.  Truth be told, I prefer it when I’m being soft-spoken myself, but like I told you yesterday, my volume control has a “loud enough to be heard” setting that for all practical purposes can go as high as needed.

Some Traditions Are Definitely Overrated

August 16, 2016

Today my son had his first day of virtual class with his teacher.  (So my snark yesterday notwithstanding, I really do have help homeschooling him.)

And it would hardly be a traditional first day of class without the traditional pre-first day of class meltdown for no apparent reason.  (On the surface, at least, it wasn’t about the class, but about me asking, then telling, him to stand back and not track through a powder spill in the floor.)

Even with the pre-class meltdown, he did okay for his first time trying to sit through a classroom situation, but I for one wish we could have dispensed with this particular “honored” tradition.

I Think I Need Help

August 15, 2016

Today my son started his first day of school . . . from home.

Did I not specifically mention I was going to try homeschooling him?  Well . . . I am.

“Why am I doing this?” you might ask.

Oh . . . well, you know . . . my life wasn’t complex enough as it was, and free time is overrated anyway.

Other Reactions Might Follow, But That Would Definitely Be The First

August 12, 2016

To those who might have wondered how I’d respond if my son one day announced to me, “Dad, I’m gay,” I suspect my first reaction would be, “Hi, Gay.  I’m Dad.”

Gotcha!

August 11, 2016

Last night I noticed I had a small bump on my eyelid, and Lala suggested I soak a green tea bag in water, then hold the tea bag over my eyelid as a compress.  I’d heard that advice before, so I went ahead and did as she said.  A little while later she sees me with my hand over my eye, and asks me how I doing.

“Terrible!” I answered with a wince.  “Now my eye is inflamed and really, really hurts.”  I gave her just enough time to think I was serious before ruefully sighing and adding, “Next time maybe I shouldn’t use boiling water . . .”

A True Major Canis Threat

August 10, 2016

Today my son and I learned two things together:

#1.  Working at the appropriate scale, if the Sun was positioned at the front door of our house, Pluto’s orbit would be located somewhere in my office at the back of the house.

#2.  Small dogs are the terror of planetary orbital stability when working at this scale.

And I Understood EXACTLY How It Felt

August 9, 2016

Today I sat through my first virtual meeting/presentation.

My computer kept trying to fall asleep.

An Internal Monologue

August 8, 2016

Right!  I meant to place the order for that cleaner that was recommended to L’s Mother.  Let’s see here . . .

Ground shipping only.  Huh.  That’s not a problem, but it seems odd for them to specify like that.  Oh, it’s because the chemicals are toxic.

Oh. 

Well . . . you could say pretty much the same thing about bleach, right?  You just have to be careful.  

Wow.  Look at the all the cities in Alaska that you can’t ship this stuff to. 

Well . . .  I don’t live in Alaska, nor do I live in any of the countries you can’t ship this stuff to either.

Maybe I should consider moving, but in meantime I think I’ll be looking at alternative cleaning methods . . .

Signs It Has Been A Stressful Week

August 5, 2016

“Go wash your face,” Lala told L. yesterday.

“But – ” he started to protest.

“No, she said your face,” I corrected him.

So Don’t Worry, She’s Ahead On Points

August 4, 2016

Now if any of you out there felt I was being a tad . . . unrelenting on L’s Mother last week, rest assured that she got her own back.  (She always does.)

Last Friday she came in looking about as worn down as I’ve ever seen her, and she confessed to me that she had just been “faking it” the entire day.

She then smirked and informed me that if I played my cards right, I “could be a part of that later in the evening.”