When Gaming And Birthdays Collide

She’s [age redacted]? It’s time for her to start gearing up!

– L., age 10, making a joke upon hearing his grandmother’s age

That Was Fair (And Funny)

I think it’s time for you to shut the “L” up now on that joke.

– My son, L, after me telling one too many “L” jokes the other day

So That’s Why I Decided To Share This Tale

I feel like yesterday’s post deserves the full story, so here it is:

Two hours after placing an order, I learned that the delivery needed to be rescheduled if at all possible (It wouldn’t be a tragedy if it wasn’t), so I asked what could be done. I was told that since the order had already been processed, they’d have to coordinate with the shipper, but it should be possible. I thanked them for anything they could do, and moved on.

The “manage your expectations” e-mail was how I was informed (by a different customer service rep) that the delivery had been successfully rescheduled.

Now it should be understood that this company specializes in gifts for special occasions, and feelings tend to run high among customers when it comes to gifts and delivery dates. As such I could easily laugh this response off as nothing more than an unfortunate bit of frustration breaching though someone’s professionalism, but I couldn’t help but picturing just how . . . poorly that turn of phrase could have been received by someone else.

Guess Which One I Got Recently

The right way to say this to me: Unfortunately, some delays are out of our control, and we hope for your understanding should that occur.

The wrong way to say this to me: We highly suggest that you manage your expectations in case of any delay.

I Think This Says A Lot About Me

Even before I posted what I posted yesterday, I was aware that I had posted something similar in the past. What I found amusing however is that apparently the same basic (tongue-in-cheek) thought while sleepy is philosophy, but when had fully awake it’s logic.

Dog Logic

If the dog didn’t bark, you didn’t knock. Q.E.D.

The Mix Seemed To Be One Part Brilliance To Nine Parts Balderdash

Though I can come across as an overly negative person at times, the truth of the matter is a little more complex. Yes, the better something is the more likely I am to look for a negative, but the worse something is the more likely I am to look for a positive. Truthfully, I think this is primarily my contrary nature manifesting, and not any warped concept of “balance,” per se.

Regardless, case in point:

Yesterday I read the latest publication for a setting I absolutely love, and my unfiltered reaction to it was, “Huh . . . they have some good ideas in here for people who have completely missed the point of this setting.”

Just Ask The Giant From “Jack and the Beanstalk”

I can’t take credit for this one, but neither do I have a reliable source for it. Even so, I want to record it here:

Remember, fairy tale endings don’t work out so well for every character.

We’re All Mad Here

“But at the moment, I’m temporarily . . .” L’s Mother trailed off as she sought the right word.

“Going mad?” I ‘helpfully’ supplied.

“No,” said answered after brief consideration. “I’m pretty sure there’s nothing temporary about that.”

“That’s fair,” I conceded.

May That Be The ONLY Credit It EVER Gets From This House

Particularly after yesterday’s post, lest you think that L’s Mother can’t hold her own, right after I walked out the room she gave the most theatrical heartbreaking sniffle I have ever heard.

“That was really good!” I told her as I walked back into the room.

“I know, right?” she agreed. “Allergy season deserves a lot of the credit though.”