Archive for the ‘Lala’ Category

That Still Counts, I Guess

May 18, 2017

“You are a goddess among mortals,” I told Lala yesterday as she handed me a much needed cup of cheer.

Preening, she responded with, “I’ve always known that, but it’s nice to have it acknowledged.”

I looked at her askance.  “A goddess of arrogance, it seems,” I sighed.

I Thought It Was The Perfect Retort

April 24, 2017

The other day at work one of Lala’s coworkers literally swept her off her feet into a hug.  Now, Lala is on the tall side, so this was a new experience for her.

“He just picked me up like I was nothing!” she gushed to another coworker.

“Oh, honey, you’re beautiful!” said coworker replied, meaning well, but completely missing the point and underscoring just how . . . odd this culture can be when it comes weight.

Lala just looked at her quizzically and retorted, “Nobody said anything about me being ugly!”

Not . . . Both Of Them, No

March 16, 2017

After posting yesterday, I told Lala that I had “successfully found two thoughts to rub together,” and that I was going back to bed now.

“Those thoughts were about girls, weren’t they?” she asked with a smirk.

Lala, I’m Looking At YOU!

January 12, 2017

This week my son’s class talked about the power of the word “yet” in the sense that it’s not that you “can’t” do something, it’s just that you can’t do it yet.

It’s an important lesson, and I say that as a parent who has all but banned his son from using the word “never” until he learns to use it properly and not just as part of a frustrated “I’ll never be able to do this!”  (Spoiler:  Once he calms down and stops fussing at whatever it is he’s fussing at, he usually can, and when he can’t, he generally just needs more practice before he can.)

Still . . .  there’s a time and a place for every lesson, and when you know that someone is feeling awful after a terrible night, and they’ve just snarled at you for greeting them with a cheery “Good morning!”, grinning at them and saying “You mean it’s not a good morning yet!” is just flat out poking the bear.

The Exact Time This Morning Was “Too Early”

November 7, 2016

Overheard this morning:

“Watch your kid knee around my kidney!”

Because *I’m* The Master Of Sarcasm Around Here

November 1, 2016

Lala:  (Sarcastically and like Magenta from Rocky Horror.)  Master, your coffee is prepared!

Me:  If you’re going to say it, say it like you mean it.

When Worlds Collide

October 26, 2016

Me:  I don’ t understand it when I see girls wearing short skirts paired with heavy leggings.

Lala:  Sometimes it’s too cold to wear a skirt without leggings.

Me:  Then isn’t it too cold to wear a skirt then?

Lala:  (Long pause)  Whaaaaaat?


August 11, 2016

Last night I noticed I had a small bump on my eyelid, and Lala suggested I soak a green tea bag in water, then hold the tea bag over my eyelid as a compress.  I’d heard that advice before, so I went ahead and did as she said.  A little while later she sees me with my hand over my eye, and asks me how I doing.

“Terrible!” I answered with a wince.  “Now my eye is inflamed and really, really hurts.”  I gave her just enough time to think I was serious before ruefully sighing and adding, “Next time maybe I shouldn’t use boiling water . . .”

Signs It Has Been A Stressful Week

August 5, 2016

“Go wash your face,” Lala told L. yesterday.

“But – ” he started to protest.

“No, she said your face,” I corrected him.

I Never Forget These Things

July 19, 2016

Last night Lala tried port wine for the first time and announced, “I wasn’t so sure about this port, but I’d heard that starboard was good, so I wanted to try it.”

Now I like a good pun as much as the next guy, but I thought this was a bit much coming from the person who didn’t like my molasses pun.