The other day I told Lala that apparently I wanted to empathize with her more, and therefore pulled something in my back out of sympathy with her own recent pulled back.
Her response: “That was painful and dumb.”
She then went on to assure me that she was kidding, and she hoped that I felt better faster than she had, but with a lead up like that, I had NO problem telling her that, “Put that way, I hope I do too!”
After initial resistance, have conceded the fact that Lala is gone, and have begun feasting upon her remains.
(She’s fine, just elsewhere for the duration, but this rather gory thought came to me today as I began in earnest to polish off some of the perishables she left behind.)
Me yesterday: Huh, I didn’t think we were out of that creamer yet. Oh well, I can open another one.
Me today: Wow, Lala is really going through the creamer lately! Time to open another one, I guess . . .
Lala to me not long after that: Please tell me you didn’t open another creamer!
You know you’re talking to family when you mention in passing that you’re feeling queasy this morning and that almost never happens to you, and the instant response is “Maybe you’re pregnant.”
(Let the record reflect that I do know today is the anniversary of this blog; I just don’t find that fact very interesting at this point, and, yes, it is magic to be married to me.)
Yesterday Lala misspoke and created the word “overneath,” a feat for which I initially teased her. “Congratulations,” I facetiously told her, “for creating a nonsense word worthy of the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party; a word they would doubtlessly use to describe the placement of their saucers as they . . . stacked the cups and saucers on top of each other, making the saucers over one cup and under another . . .”
I shook my head wryly. “Actually, that’s a pretty good word,” I had to admit. “Congratulations.”
Yesterday a storm rolled in with surprising speed, and I found myself thinking of my grandmother and how she absolutely loathed such storms.
That’s why when I alerted Lala (who was taking a bath at the time) about the storm, I found myself saying, “Lala Lou! There’s a storm comin’ in!”
Me: (thinking) That looks like some kind of delicious cinnamon cereal! (out loud while resisting the urge to steal a piece from the bowl while Lala isn’t looking) “What is that?”
Lala: “Pork rinds.”
Me: (blanching) “I’m really glad I didn’t steal some then!”
Lala got me some beard conditioner for Father’s Day because there have been one too many “Ouch! Pokey!” complaints from the household of late, and I wanted to give some conditioner a shot. When she gave it to me I found myself looking mildly askance at the brand name, “Naked Prince.”
“I prefer princesses, given a choice . . .” I started to say, but Lala both cut me off and topped my intended joke.
“Especially for rubbing on your face,” she concluded for me as innocently as it’s possible to say something like that innocently.
Paraphrased from a text conversation between me and Lala:
Me: “Just dropped L’s Mother off for her appointment. Now to make the decision on how to spend my time for a bit.”
Lala: “You’ll find some place awesome. You have that knack.”
Me: (thinking) I don’t know if that’s really accurate.
Me: (Also thinking, but now after I’ve finished eating) That deep fried raspberry cheesecake with vanilla ice cream, whipped cream, and caramel drizzle really was pretty good.
There once was a chigger,
Who wasn’t any bigger,
Than the point of a very small pin.
But the lump that he raises,
Itches like the blazes,
And that’s where the rub comes in, comes in,
That’s where the rub comes in!
– A bit of old verse taught to me by my mother
Candles & Curses 