Archive for the ‘Letters to L.’ Category

She Wouldn’t Be His Mother If She Didn’t

September 11, 2020

Yesterday my son chimed in with his two cents worth regarding my recent posts about his mother:

“You’re lucky she finds that sort of thing funny,” he essentially told me.

And while that is, of course, true as far as it goes, the more important truth is that he is lucky that she finds that sort of thing funny.

And That’s What I Did

September 4, 2020

Sometimes as a parent I have to admit that I end up asking myself, “What would Mister Rogers do?”, and I always (and I mean always) end up looking the worse for the comparison.

But last night when I was woken up by my son at three in the morning because he was “super hungry” and asking for popcorn, then when accommodated he promptly made a loud “Bleagh!” while proclaiming equally loudly that he didn’t want to eat anything after all, and when I asked myself that question again, something different happened this time. I could almost hear Mister Rogers saying, “I would never have sung songs about what to do when you’re angry if I’d never felt anger myself. I suggest you go back to sleep now.”

Something That Came Out Of A Conversation With My Son This Morning

September 2, 2020

Frequently the “boring” stuff is also the most important stuff.

Something To Keep In Mind

August 21, 2020

Normally, son, I don’t like referencing a lesson here when we covered it in person only yesterday, but this one is important enough I thought it warranted the exception:

Remember, whatever mess you make when you’re upset is the same mess you’re going to have to deal with when you’re no longer upset.

So In This Case For Me It Was A Matter Of Linguistic Precision

August 18, 2020

Over the weekend I came damn near to kicking something with the same toe I injured a while back, and I said as much out loud. This prompted L’s Mother to stage whisper to our son that, “Your Dad said ‘damn,'” to which I responded, “You’re damn right I did.”

While we were just being playful, this still prompted a fresh conversation with L. about when it is and is not appropriate to use certain language, how cultural mores can vary, and how that can impact the message you’re trying to convey. “For instance,” I said, “while this isn’t true for everyone, but among my people if you say that you ‘nearly’ kicked something, you came close, but if you say you came ‘damn near’ to kicking something, you came REALLY close.”

So I’ve Had A Lot On My Plate Lately, Is What I’m Saying

August 10, 2020

Son, I get that in the past couple of weeks in particular, more often than not my response to you asking “Can you ________?” has been somewhere on the “amusement to exasperation” scale. I know I’ve already told you that as soon as I can, I will (and we’re definitely on for that chess game once I’ve posted this and had a quick tea break), but I what I haven’t told you is why my response has been what it has been lately.

Put simply, one of the things on my to-do list that has been helping me keep going is my morning workout (really nothing more than some light stretching and the like to help wake me up, prep for my day, and make it more likely I’ll be up for a more serious workout later in the day), and for the past couple of weeks, not only has my “morning workout” been my only workout, it has consistently been in the afternoon . . .

Just Remember That It IS Possible

August 6, 2020

Like I was telling you earlier today, son, the ability to see possibilities where others see none is incredibly useful, but equally useful is the ability to recognize the choices before you and being able to pick one. Ideally you’ll pick the best one, but sometimes there won’t be a clear “best one,” and you may still have to pick. This may feel impossible at times, but if you can manage to do it anyway, you’ll be at a level that most people never reach.

Point To The Boy For That One

July 28, 2020

Yesterday the “Not-So-Brave Hero” was sighted around here, and (for some reason) he was being attacked by soldiers, leading to the following exchange:

The Not-So-Brave Hero (a.k.a., me): Why are you even attacking me in the first place? What are you, some kind of heedless horseman?!

Soldier #1 (a.k.a., my son): I don’t even have a horse, so that makes me a “steedless” horseman!

And Not For The First Time

June 30, 2020

Regarding yesterday’s post, I just wanted to clarify that while I’m in no way above setting up for a joke, I like to make it clear upfront when I’m doing so. What I posted yesterday actually happened the way I wrote it. I was feeling a tad maudlin and staring at what I had written knowing that the post needed something, when my son came in and provided it.

I Get Credit For That, Right?

June 29, 2020

Some days I wonder which is going to be harder, for my son to forgive me for the mistakes I make as a father, or for me to forgive myself.

Then, like just now (no joke), he interrupts me to ask if I can clean up the mess the dog made because he doesn’t want to touch it, and I do stop and clean it up because that is part of my current duties as a father.