Learning To Let Go

June 20, 2022

If you’re not part of someone’s path to learning, they will not learn from you, and this will not change no matter how much you think they need to learn something.

That Solved That Mystery Pretty Quickly

June 17, 2022

For most of my life I never bothered to track what I ate. I never gave it much thought to be honest, figuring that keeping a “general idea” of what I was eating would be enough.

Then there came a point where I was clearly starting to put on pounds around my middle, and I couldn’t figure out why. I wasn’t particularly indulging myself, and I wasn’t doing anything (I thought) especially different, so I started keeping track and still couldn’t figure it out.

Until I remembered to include the several tablespoons of peanut butter and jelly I was consuming per day because my son was going through a PB&J phase, and I always had leftover and didn’t want it to go to waste.

“The Moon . . . Really? Huh.”

June 16, 2022

I’m in no way saying that I’m a believer in reincarnation, but if reincarnation is a thing, I have to believe that I was done with this planet right up until the point I asked, “They landed where now?”

When Probability IS Your Friend

June 15, 2022

I’ve talked before about my grandmother and her ability to see possibilities, and I’ve alluded that this is a trait that I share. I’ve also talked a little bit about knife safety.

Today those worlds collided as I, a little too casually, grabbed a knife and instantly foresaw how if just the wrong number of things happened in just the wrong way, I could do myself a serious mischief. Pausing, I adjusted my grip on the knife and said to myself, “That would have been a stupid way to die.”

That’s the good side of seeing possibilities.

The bad side is that after I said that I also briefly foresaw in unnecessary detail the trauma such self-inflicted mischief would have had on the rest of the household. That’s the point I had to remind myself just how unlikely such a scenario would be, and that I’ve already corrected the problem in any event.

Good thing I’m used to this.

And That’s When I Knew Her Day Was REALLY Bad

June 14, 2022

L’s Mother: I’m not having a good day, and I also don’t feel well, so I’m going to take a bath while I’ve got the chance.

Me: (Knowing that we’ve had lightning strikes in our area recently.) Would you like me to check the weather for you first so you don’t get electrocuted and die?

L’s Mother: *pauses just a little too long before answering*

“Smug Jerk” Is An All-Inclusive Category, Once You Start Adding Further Labels To It, You May Have (Or BE) A Problem

June 13, 2022

While it’s not the noblest of character traits to take pleasure from seeing some smug jerk “being taken down a peg,” there are far worse traits.

For instance, one of those worse traits is taking pleasure from seeing someone “being taken down a peg,” and your pleasure comes from the fact that they happen to be a gender, race, orientation, etc. that you have a personal problem with.

I Just Wish They Were Less Noisy And Didn’t Make Such A Mess

June 10, 2022

While contemplating a family of Canada Geese that has taken up occasional residence in our yard, L’s Mother commented, “I know they may be considered an invasive species(1), but I kind of like them.”

That was the moment I realized that I feel the same way about humans.

**********

(1) They’re not, but Muscovy Ducks are, so it was a reasonable guess.

And Pokemon Go . . . And Pocket Camp . . .

June 9, 2022

The next time someone asks me, “How familiar are you with technology?”, I’m just going to answer, “I’ve had evening plans delayed due to Minecraft.”

I Feel Like I Just Lived An Analogy

June 8, 2022

We’ve had some flooding here recently (nothing dire . . . in our area, at least), and with that came the opportunity for me to potentially get a free canoe. I’m guessing someone didn’t secure it well before the storm (I certainly hope that’s what happened!), and it drifted onto my property. For all I know it was another gift from the water spirits.

However it got there though, I don’t need a canoe, and I certainly didn’t want to wade the flood waters to secure the thing, so I said “Thanks, but no thanks,” and left it where it was, figuring it looked pretty secure as is, and I could deal with it later once the water receded.

It was completely gone when I looked fifteen minutes later.

A Thought I Legitimately Had While Doing Some Home Repair Today

June 7, 2022

I don’t know who tightened this, but I’m willing to bet their last name was Banner or Walters . . . possibly Ross.