Yesterday I was reminded of one of my favorite “inspiring a Google search to get the reference” jokes, and I wanted to record it here:
Back in the day I considered studying ancient Egyptian plumbing in college, but I decided the world didn’t need any more “Pharaoh Faucet Majors.”
Arguably the worst misconception fiction gives us is the misconception that “taking the chance” is the same thing as succeeding.
Yesterday I got extremely impatient with the “Impatience” tag I used yesterday because I originally entered it as “impatience,” and the system kept insisting on replacing my attempts at correction with my original entry.
But at least I was aware of the irony.
You don’t know impatient until you’re a monkey waiting for a donut.
“I give up!” my son proclaimed (loudly) while playing a game this morning.
“Forever?” I asked.
“No, just for now,” he answered.
“Good,” I chuckled, “because if I gave up ‘forever’ the first time your mother frustrated me, you wouldn’t be here.”
The question put to me: Have you ever ghosted someone?
My answer: I don’t think so, no, and certainly never intentionally!
The question rephrased: Have you ever stopped talking to someone because you realized you were always the one initiating the conversation, and you figured that if they wanted to talk to you again, they would?
Me: Ummmm, that’s not the same thing . . . is it?
As much as I hate to say it, you probably are accident prone when your friends start unironically gifting you things like band-aids and non-slip sauna shoes.
It’s one thing to not be ready for the start of a new day or even a new week, but it’s quite another thing to not be ready for the start of a new year.
Nothing brings a parent and child closer faster than embarking on a mutual conspiracy against the other parent.
Candles & Curses 