On a much needed lighter note, today my son, L., and I were playing with our dog, Isa, and my son got some of her fur in his mouth, prompting us both to laugh.
“Oh, Isa,” I said to the dog because she was looking confused. “You’re always good for amusement even when sometimes you don’t mean to be.”
“Like my mom!” L. chimed in.
The other day I told Lala that apparently I wanted to empathize with her more, and therefore pulled something in my back out of sympathy with her own recent pulled back.
Her response: “That was painful and dumb.”
She then went on to assure me that she was kidding, and she hoped that I felt better faster than she had, but with a lead up like that, I had NO problem telling her that, “Put that way, I hope I do too!”
This morning out of the corner of my eye I saw L’s Mother do a cute little stage-worthy side kick in the kitchen. I figured she was probably just in a good mood, but I decided I wanted the full story.
“What was that for?” I asked her.
She shot me a curious look. “I nearly lost my balance.”
“Oh,” I said. “Well it was adorable in my peripheral vision.”
Me: I’m going to lie down for a bit and try and replenish some energy.
My son: (not really listening) You’re going to punish what?
Me: “Replenish some energy.” *shakes head* I’m going to punish some synergy!
My son: Oh, okay!
Fifteen or so minutes later my son stomps past my door noisily protesting (again) that his mother isn’t available at the exact moment he wanted her for something.
Me: (groggily) Well . . . there’s the synergy . . .
As a follow-up to yesterday’s post:
In fairness to L’s Mother, the reason she was following me down the hallway was so she and L. could talk somewhere other than my office. (She didn’t tell me this, but I recognized what was going on.)
Me: *having trouble focusing my thoughts at my desk*
L’s Mother: *comes in to my office to vent about her day*
(This is not a problem; this is just part of being a family.)
Me: *starts to say something to L’s Mother*
L: *comes in to my office and starts trying to talk over me to tell his mom something*
(This is a problem, albeit a minor one, but this is also just part of being a family.)
Me: *decides to leave the office so they can talk and maybe I can find some peace to focus*
L’s Mother: *follows me down the hallway while listening to L.*
L: *follows his mother while chatting away*
Me: Well . . . at least I have something to write about now.
L’s Mother (First thing this morning): I took a gender role test!
Me (Still sleepy): Did you pass?
L’s Mother: I got a 117%!
Me: . . .
Yesterday I attended my first real on-line wedding. The couple made the decision they didn’t want the quarantine to spoil their plans any more than it already had, so they had an in-house wedding with the guests attending virtually.
I personally found this pleasant because this is the first wedding I’ve ever attended where someone didn’t call attention to my lack of pants.
What? How else is everyone supposed to know who the best man is?
Last night it turns out that all of us were feeling a bit restless as midnight approached. This is my best paraphrased reconstruction of the thoughts and actions that lead to the event I shall forever dub “The Midnight Screaming.”
Me: It’s almost midnight, but at least I’m almost asleep. Just need to be still and quiet . . .
L.: I think I’ll watch something on my phone.
L’s Mother: Do I hear L. laughing? What’s he doing still awake? I’d better check on him.
L.: I need to go to the bathroom. (Opens door to the unexpected sight of his mother standing right there.)
L.: *screams*
L’s Mother: (Yelling) It’s okay. Don’t yell!
Me: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!
After initial resistance, have conceded the fact that Lala is gone, and have begun feasting upon her remains.
(She’s fine, just elsewhere for the duration, but this rather gory thought came to me today as I began in earnest to polish off some of the perishables she left behind.)
