Posts Tagged ‘Oddities’

Social Media Can Tell You Surprising Things Sometimes

June 10, 2021

Today on this date, according to a shared memory, one of my nieces spent an amazing day riding horses with friends.

Apparently on this same date (albeit some years prior) *I* was waxing nostalgic about Jonah Hex.

That’s just not something I ever expected to know.

Ladies And Gentlemen . . . Welcome To Florida

June 2, 2021

(We interrupt our intended line of thought with this special announcement.)

I’m rarely at a loss for words, but learning that a full grown man tried to invoke the “stand your ground” defense over his killing of an iguana just has me gobsmacked today.

Fortunately I Knew That L’s Mother Had Recently Ordered Something For Her Snake PLANT

July 1, 2020

Today has been filled with a series of odd little out of context moments for me, but nothing tops the text notification I received informing me that my “live indoor snake” had shipped.

He Uses Them As Nightlights

February 18, 2020

Me:  I’m just going to change the batteries in L’s candles.  *pauses*  We live in a weird age!

The A.I. Awakening Edges Ever Closer

July 15, 2019

Okay, this a new one.  I’m used to spam and spambots at this point, but I’ve got to admit that today is the first time a spambot has ever tried to talk football with me.

Huh

March 29, 2019

One of my favorite gags in Mystery Men involved the idea of “chicken rentals.”  So much so that for a time I included “chicken rentals” on my business cards in the hopes that somebody would ask “Who would want to rent a chicken?“.

Today I learned that chicken rentals are an actual thing.  (Apparently a lot of people learned this today and the sites seem to be overloaded, so I’m not including a link here, but you can seriously search for “chicken rentals” yourself and see what I’m talking about.)

Yes, Things Like This Really Happen To Me

March 29, 2018

What follows starts out as something that was actually said to me recently (albeit paraphrased for clarity), and ends with something completely made up to make it even funnier:

Tipsy Fortuneteller:  “You have . . . changed your destiny.  Remarkable.  You were born to be a sociopath . . . a monster, but you have changed that . . .”

Me:  “Go home, Mom.  You’re drunk.”

That’s . . . A Good Question, Actually

January 5, 2018

In honor of this week’s unexpected food theme, here’s another food related entry:

A friend of mine was playing around with a new touchscreen order board at a popular American fast food establishment near him when he discovered something . . . odd.

The price of a sausage biscuit was $1.

The price of a regular biscuit though was $1.39, leaving him to wonder if the sausage was somehow subsidizing the biscuit?

A Weird Fact To Suit My Weird Mood

December 20, 2017

When using an electric razor to shave your head, it sounds disturbingly like you are grinding your skull away.

There’s No Shame In Admitting We Both Had To Look It Up

May 1, 2017

This morning via text L’s Mother tried to congratulate me on replacing a door handle, but for some reason “handle” autocorrected to “hydrangea.”  Her response to this was very . . . her:

Seriously?  THAT’S what it gets from ‘handle’?  Whose vocabulary needs that on autocorrect?

I could only think of one response:

Landscapers?