And It is

Me: (thinking) I didn’t know that app had a call function, but I recognize that name, now if I can just get the app to cooperate . . . there we go! (out loud) Hey! Long time no talk to!

Other Person: I wasn’t sure that you’d pick up!

Me: Of course I would! (thinking) Why would they think I wouldn’t pick up? That’s ridiculous!

Me: *suddenly imaging me being the one to spontaneously call them instead, and knowing for a fact that I’d be thinking, “They probably won’t even pick up.”*

Me: (thinking) Well it’s still ridiculous . . .

Saying This Got Me High-Fived

Last night L’s Mother’s dinner experiment didn’t go well. All of us, and especially L’s Mother, agreed this one was a “meh.”

“I have the ingredients to make more,” she told me without enthusiasm, “but I know you’re not exactly dying to eat this again.”

“Let me put it this way,” I replied. “While killing someone would be excessive, I would gleefully stub someone else’s toe to never have to eat that again.”

I Have A Point

Me: (Looking around at various and assorted boxes of things I’ve needed to go through for some time.) This is going to take me months!

Also me: Well . . . since it took years to accumulate, that’s actually not too bad.

I Should Probably Apply This Principle To Other Things As Well

I’ll hold onto a book for a lot of reasons, because I enjoyed it, because I thought it was interesting, because I have a history with it, because I think it’s important, and so on.

As I am currently undertaking an overdue inventory of my library though, I’ve come to realize that holding onto a book just because I read it isn’t a good reason to hold onto it.

You Keep Using That Word. I Do Not Think It Means What You Think It Means (Redux)

It’s not always easy, but I try to stay at the healthy point between skepticism and keeping an open mind because I know how ridiculous sounding things can be true, just as reasonable sounding things can be false. With that said, once money becomes involved I consider it healthy to err on the side of skepticism.

Not everyone I know feels this way, however.

And while I’ve never had this exact conversation, what follows is a good example of some of the conversations I have had:

Me: So what you’re saying is that you bought ‘magic beans,’ is that it?

Them: No! I bought science beans!

Do You Ever Get The Feeling You’re Not Viewing The Same World That Other People Are?

Me listening to a Nordic lullaby: The singer has a lovely voice.

The comments section: The singer has a lovely voice!

Also the comments section: This song makes me want to live close to nature!

Me: This song is about a mother telling a hungry wolf she won’t let it eat her child!

At Least The Only Lasting Harm Was To My Bumper

One of the advantages of perspective is it gives you the opportunity to realize that not every stupid thing you’ve done was actually “stupid.” For instance, once I managed to wedge my back bumper over a concrete pylon that was invisible to me from the driver’s seat as I tried to maneuver my vehicle around and out of a narrow road that had been unexpectedly blocked off. While I felt especially stupid at the time, I had no visibility and truly was being as careful as I possibly could. The pylon just happened to be the perfect height for me to back over it seamlessly right before the incline shifted just enough to link the bumper and pylon like they were Legos. It was such an improbably perfect fit that even looking right at it once I got out of the vehicle, it took me a while to see it and figure out what had happened.

I’m a little less sure if my gunning the engine and rocking the vehicle until enough of both the pylon and the bumper shifted enough for me to get free was the best solution, but it was the fastest.

That’s Just The Way It Is, And That’s Okay

While some may believe otherwise, none of us have total control over events in our lives. While you can heavily slant the odds in your favor, there is nothing you can do to guarantee that you’ll have a good harvest.

But there’s a lot of things you can do to guarantee that you won’t.

Another Pratchett Quote (Because It Gave Me Some Peace)

Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.

– Terry Pratchett

So I Was Wrong Then

Blazing Saddles is one of my all-time favorite movies for reasons I don’t feel I need to go into, but I’ve long felt the ending fell a little flat after the fourth wall shatter and the fight spilling into the movie studio. While that part was fun, I never really thought it was necessary.

But recently having watched online a number of people reacting to seeing the movie for the first time, I’ve decided that the utter absurdity of the ending is required to make it abundantly clear to all that, yes, the movie is indeed a satire.