Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’

I’ve Been Struggling With That My Whole Life, Which Includes The Entire Time She’s Known Me

September 5, 2019

Last night L’s Mother had an ephipheny.  I’d just finished saying that I needed someone (not her) to stop telling me that I was going to react in a certain way, because it was only making me defensive and therefore less likely that I would react in the way they wanted, when L’s Mother looked at me and said, “I just realized something; you are innately defiant!”.

I have to admit, her saying that to me shook me to my very core.  “You mean you just figured that out now?” I asked in genuine utter disbelief.

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My Exact Response Was A Horrified “Oh, God!”

April 29, 2019

L’s Mother hurt her eye a few days back, not badly, but it looked horrible, more red than any other color, particularly the next day.  So much so that I had already admitted to her that I found the sight of it disturbing.

This is perhaps a weakness I should not have drawn attention to.

The next morning (early enough that I wasn’t even thinking about her eye yet) she came into my office wearing a red and white sundress, and proclaimed, “You never complement me when I wear something that matches my eyes anymore!”.

But It Made Me Smile On A Day I TRULY Needed A Smile

September 18, 2018

(Another paraphrased encounter with L’s Mother.)

“Since you said you were going to wait until your foot was better to move the trampoline, I was going to move it for you,” she told me this morning.  “Then I realized if I could move it, you could move it, and you probably meant you were waiting to move it until you could use it again.”

She was right too.

We’ve Had A Lot Of Restless Nights Lately, You See

September 17, 2018

(The following is paraphrased, but still an accurate representation of what I took away from the event.)

“You were wonderful last night,” L’s Mother told me with a loving smile early Saturday morning.

Now it’s not that I’ve never heard that sentiment before, but this time it confused me.  “All we did last night was sleep,” I reminded her.

“Yeah . . .” she sighed with contentment.

Because That IS Who We Are

July 20, 2018

Now I freely admit regarding the event I mentioned yesterday, that a lesser woman would have made my life Hell for a while after something like that, but not L’s Mother.  That’s just not who either of us are.  Another case in point:

Not long after the picture incident, L’s Mother came in and started venting about something at work, and while I was listening, I was also lacking some necessary context, so I was only getting about half the story and I knew it.  Even so, I kept listening, and as the story continued I pulled her a little closer to me.

Smirking, she paused and said, “Annnnd you haven’t heard a word I’ve said, have you?”

Feigning offense, I retorted “Of course I have!”

“Uh huh,” she said.  “And what word have you heard?”

“‘Said'” I said with a grin.

Not Even REMOTELY What I Meant!

July 19, 2018

Noting that her hair looked particularly good one day, L’s Mother asked me to take a picture of her; pleased with the results, she decided to use said picture to update her work profile picture.  Personally I felt the picture, while technically fine, didn’t really capture her . . . . essence, for lack of a better word, so later on I mentioned I didn’t care for the picture because it “didn’t look like her” to me.

This prompted her to burst into peals of laughter.

Suspicious and wary, but still needing to know, I asked her what was so funny.

Still laughing, she gasped, “Everyone at the office today told me they liked it because it made me look pretty!”

Her Response: “Well . . . YEAH!”

August 3, 2017

It turns out that a while back someone asked my wife and one of her coworkers what the secret of a successful marriage was.  The coworker stressed the importance of harmony and that the wife should tend to all the husband’s needs, wants, and comforts.

It was at this point in the story that I interrupted my wife’s telling to laugh and observe that “Clearly your philosophy is different!”

Sometimes It’s All In The Framing

April 21, 2017

After a couple of hours of struggling to keep my son on track for today’s schoolwork, I finally got the chance to pour myself a cup from the pot of coffee that had been brewed fresh around the time the day’s conflict had begun.  Instead of a stream of coffee, however, I was rewarded with a drizzle.

“Really?”  I sighed.  “All that work and my reward is coffee dregs?”  I sighed again, then added without enthusiasm, “Yay, fatherhood.”

At this point L’s mother beckoned me over and made a gesture that is really none of your business.  Suffice it to say that once I caught my breath again, I managed a far more enthusiastic “Yay, fatherhood!” and got on with my day.

Sometimes It’s Just The Right Thing To Say (And Of Course I DID Promise)

March 24, 2017

L’s Mother and I haven’t had much time for each other lately with all of us being some degree of under the weather . . . and because L. is six.  In fact, last night she was bemoaning this fact, so I gently pulled her into my arms and assured her that soon we’d all be feeling better again and that she’d be [Censored.  SERIOUSLY Censored.  Whatever you think I might have said here, it’s probably tame in comparison to what I actually said!] in no time.

Now I’m pretty good at gauging my audience, but I wasn’t 100% sure I’d said the right thing until I saw her eyes mist over as she smiled at me and asked, “Really?!  Promise?!”

I’ve Always Wanted To Say That To Someone

March 6, 2017

I’ve heard that some people like to introduce role-play into their relationships from time to time.  (Mental note:  Pick up  the Alan Scott cape from the drycleaners, then check on how much it would cost to get the mandolin retuned.  Remember to delete this note before posting.*)  I’ve even heard that some people like to do this in public, so when I saw an opportunity to try this with L’s Mother in the grocery store the other day, I decided to give it a try.

Moving the cart up close to her, I looked her straight in the eye and said, “Lady, would you please just get the hell out of my way?!”

It was strangely satisfying.

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*  I’m kidding . . . the mandolin doesn’t really need to be retuned.