Posts Tagged ‘Snark’

And If You’re Planning To Be Stupid, You Still Have Time To Change That

July 3, 2020

Well . . . July 4th weekend is coming up around here, and I just wanted to say that however you’re planning to celebrate, don’t be stupid about it.

Then I Realized The Latter Would Probably Be A More Interesting Read

June 23, 2020

Just now I saw an ad promising to reveal the secrets of “alchemy and mysticism,” but for one moment I read that as revealing the secrets of “alcohol and mysticism.”

Would You Believe That **** Stands For “Help” In This Case? Yeah, Neither Would I

June 18, 2020

Today is one of those days that I just woke up with a song in my heart.

Unfortunately that song is “Go **** yourself!” set to music.

We’re Both Better Now, By The Way

May 29, 2020

The other day I told Lala that apparently I wanted to empathize with her more, and therefore pulled something in my back out of sympathy with her own recent pulled back.

Her response: “That was painful and dumb.”

She then went on to assure me that she was kidding, and she hoped that I felt better faster than she had, but with a lead up like that, I had NO problem telling her that, “Put that way, I hope I do too!”

Particularly At Parties

May 25, 2020

Self-improvement is a wonderful thing to keep to yourself.

Okay, Maybe It’s Not So Much Of A Secret, Come To Think

May 19, 2020

“Do you know where Miss Eat-n-arf is?” my son asked earlier today, thus revealing to me the secret identity of Social Distancing Dog.

It Wasn’t From UPS

May 14, 2020

“Hang on,” L’s Mother told me yesterday as she glanced at her watch.  “I think all my texts for today are coming in at once.  Yeah . . . I’m seeing a notification about a delivery from UPS . . . something about a baby . . .”

“From UPS?!” I just had to ask.

(By the way, congratulations, Pixie.)

I Even Do The Accent

May 13, 2020

What I almost always say:  It’s true we can’t discount that possibility until we have more data.

What I am all too often thinking while I say it:  It’s NOT a tumor!

An Observation Made In The Interest Of Keeping Things Light Today

May 11, 2020

To put it mildly, Scooby-Doo and I have a long mutual history together, but I still apologize if what I’m about to say seems sort of random:

I am fully aware that at some point it became “the done thing” to hate Scrappy-Doo, but I always liked him.  I still do in fact.

Puppy Power, *******!

An Off Switch Would Be Nice

May 8, 2020

On a lighter note, Social Distancing Dog continues to be diligent in her patrols of our home’s perimeter, and while I admire her sense of duty, our “strange puppy from another kennel” needs better control over her “sonic alert” power.