Posts Tagged ‘Understanding’

I Also Understand That A Lot Of People Aren’t

July 6, 2022

I’ve mentioned before that “being understood” is important to me. Exactly how important it is to me admittedly varies over time and circumstance, but I doubt it’ll ever stop being important to me. If I yell “Fire!”, I want people to react appropriately, be it running, grabbing a fire extinguisher, or taking careful aim before shooting. It’s important enough to me that in the grand scheme of things, agreeing with me is less important to me than understanding what I’m saying.

I think a lot of people are like that.

This Doesn’t Mean They’re Not Supporting You

November 26, 2021

It is fully possible for someone to respect your right to make a choice about your life (like, say, moving across country to be closer to some girl), and to hope that it brings you happiness (and it did), but to still think it’s a very, very bad idea (my parents were understandably less than thrilled with my decision at the time).

That’s Progress, Right?

April 6, 2021

To show how I’ve changed over the years (and how I haven’t), today I found myself comforting a friend of mine who had set up a special surprise for someone, and when this person saw it, they basically said, “Yeah, whatever” and left. My friend was understandably upset, and asked me why I thought anybody would do something like that.

There was a time I would have said, “Because they are a horrible person and they will die alone,” but this time I said, “Because they are an awful human being and need sympathy and help . . . but will probably end up dying alone nevertheless.”

Admittedly, Walking A Mile In Their Shoes Might Be Less Awkward

February 23, 2021

If you really want to understand someone’s attitude toward love and dating, try dating the people that they’ve dated.

Generally It’s When I Don’t, But There ARE Exceptions

March 12, 2020

Some days it’s a toss up on whether it upsets me more when I don’t understand people . . . or when I do.

What A Horrible Thought . . . True, But Horrible

September 19, 2017

If you want to better understand America, pay attention to the television in every waiting room you find yourself in.

– Matthew Phillion (from his Twitter)

I’ll Let You Guess Which Two I’m Thinking Of

September 15, 2015

It has been observed (specifically by Emily Dickinson) that “The Heart wants what it wants,” and that’s true enough, but if you want to really understand human behavior, you have to recognize that the same could be said of at least two more organs other than the heart . . .

Practicing Holding My Tongue Today

December 8, 2014

He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words.

Elbert Hubbard

Getting To Know You (Part Two)

October 4, 2012

Now hopefully I’ll do this story justice because I heard it a long time ago:

The way I remember it, my grandfather and his brother, who hadn’t seen each other in years(1) were finally getting the chance to catch up with each other in my grandfather’s home.  They’d chatted for an hour, maybe two, when my grandfather stands up and essentially says, “Well . . . this has been nice, but I’m tired, so I’m going to go have a nap.  If you’re not still here when I wake up, it was good talking to you.”  Then he left the room.

He was serious.

Like I said, I knew the man, so this story didn’t surprise me in the slightest, and it makes me smile every time I tell it.  Many people never know what to do with it, and the way I figure it, if my grandfather ever feels the need to explain it himself, then he’ll do it.  I never tell this story so people can better understand him anyway.

But I’ll tell you this for free:

The example he sat for me that day, I’ve never managed to emulate.  I’ve come close from time to time, but at this time I’ve yet to fully master the art of being that aware of my needs, and that willing to ignore social mores to see that need met while simultaneously managing to be polite about it.

But I never stop trying, and if you can understand that, it becomes a lot easier to get to know me.

I guarantee it.


(1)  I want to say on the order of a decade or more, but I’m not certain of that.

Getting To Know You (Part One)

October 3, 2012

In the course of a conversation yesterday it was mentioned that I was “difficult to get to know.”  Now from my point of view this isn’t particularly true, but it’s true enough that the observation didn’t sting me even a little bit, and even my impulse to protest was fleeting, but I did find myself thinking about those words later that night.

It’s certainly true that when I’m not being an extrovert I am definitely an introvert, and the flippant part of me wanted to retort something like “I’m not difficult to know, just hard to believe,” while simultaneously another portion of myself was musing, “It took me years of effort for me to get to know myself as well as I do, why would it be easier for anybody else?”

But mostly I found myself thinking about a story about my maternal grandfather that baffles some people, but it never baffled me because I understood the man.